This feeling is so unbearable. Oh my god, I wasted most of this holidays seated in front of the BLACK BOX. I should have been working my ass out by instead I choose to be a couch potato. I always comfort myself saying that my act of watching tv is a way to distress my mind and that is such a big lie to myself in every single way.
I better put a stop to the hideous lie I put up with to explain my shameful act. All of that drama and conflicts within myself have to come to an end at this very moment.
I should spend my one week holidays with no regret!!!
A big group pics with the lecturers as well.
A-Level Club organized a visit to an orphanage home is Bangsar last Saturday. I was excited about this trip but felt inferior too because this is my first time visiting an orphanage home, interacting with them personally. Lots of thoughts were in my mind the night before the visit as I am trying to figure out how should I react with them to avoid them feeling being sympathize and vulnerable. I just did not want the children or teenagers there to feel unfortunate just because i am way much more fortunate than them. My mission there is to bring cheer and joy to their day.
Cheese!And I did complete my mission with my head held high. The entire A-levels students and the children were having a whale of time. We introduced ourselves to them and then we all sang very meaningful song "Sing" by the carpenters. I got to carry young kids as young as 1 years old.
The children there are very different in a good way from the usual children I come across. When you stare into their eyes, it reflects their innocent but also their depth of understanding. There is no sound of tears throughout the entire morning. You wont get the annoying high pitch cries and hysteric screams They are so understanding for their age to compromise. They queeued up when we were distributing party packs, the young ones would politely ask for our help to open their party packs instead of them forcing it to open themselves spilling the foods all over the floor. Its just such a different scence there. Even though they were all smiles the entire day, they do have untold stories behind their closet. Once you listen to their overwhelming, thrilling, ups and downs life story, you will come to a realisation that we just pale in comparission mentally.
Here is a real life story:
This little girl is cute, adorable in every way but she has not open her mouth to say a word since her two years stay in the orphanage. Her name is Nancy and she had a harsh early childhood that led her to stay silence ever since. Nobody know why. All she seek is just attention and love from anyone. She love to be hugged and cuddled in arms and thats is the world to her. This is the power of 'HUG'. When she gets familiar with you, she will attach to you and cling on you for the entire day. Thats is her way of marking her teritory as she is proud to announce that you belong to her. You may not understand but since the children don get personal attention as we do in our homes, having someone to carry them, hug them and cuddle them is what they desire badly.
This trip is a wake-up call for me in everyway. I am so ashame of myself complaining not having this and that, and not looking like miss wannabee. Sometimes I tend to be oblivious towards my surrounding in this paper chase life. I just aim for achievements after achievements and lost the very basic sense of human touch which have kept us all intact and close. All those rants are so immature now after a day spent with the orphans. I should be feeling gratitude for being blissful in life.
Appreciate life as there will never be tomorrow.
The children sang us a farewell song before we left.
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