Haih, life is mystifying cryptic with unsolved riddles and puzzles, making me feel ambivalence. Every choice i made, I am actually solving a maze that is mind churning, exhausting, elevating and etc.
My father has been kind of pushy recently. If I sit in front of the tv for more than one hour, he would give me the stern stare and asked me the 'simple' question: "What are you doing with your life wasting your time in front of the square box?" It just a straight forward question but then I have to pause for seconds to ponder upon it. He does it like almost everyday until I got so fed up and just have the urge to act rebellious, do the opposite of what he want me to!!! Yes, I do slacked at times and I do not deny it but can he stop reminding me of slackness. I am not saying that I dislike what my father is doing as I know he is concern about me but the pressure is really building up.
As A2 creeps up closer and my AS result being released on next monday, I felt even more insecure. I just do not what to expect. Being too optimistic can be a bad thing as i may be hit with a greater disappointment, let down but if I choose to be pessimistic, then I have to spend the entire week being solemn and doleful.
Therefore, the optimum solution is to be modest, take the middle path and save myself from enduring two extreme emotions. :)
Great idea py.
On Wednesday night, my family and I attended an Art Expo Preview Night at MATRADE. We got invited to attend the opening ceremony by some Datuk. There were many art works by renowned artists around the world, actually most of the participating artists are from Asia. My sister and I were basically just lingering around the gallery with a wine glass in my hand. We will just stop at some random booth, try to figure out what is the artist trying expressing through the painting before we look at its title. Then, we will just laughed at each other ludicrous guessing. Some paintings are conspicuous with its expressions while some are just merely brain teasing. However, we did manage to guess a few correctly. On the other hand, my father did enjoy himself. He just has the flair and appreciation for exquisite arts.
Thursday was all girls day out for my family except my brother tag along. All of us except my father went for a shopping spree at Sungei Wang, Bukit Bintang Plaza and Lot10. it was a whole new shopping experience for me. With strong shopping intuition, I literally shop till I drop k. I cannot resist the temptation to pamper myself with clothes and shoes. There is a wide range of fashion at an affordable price. There were shops selling all its clothes at a flat price of RM 25 and that just lure me to buy even more. But seriously you have to have an eye for fashion because some of the clothes are seriously 'lala' . Some of the clothes on sale are just not suitable to wear to college or anywhere else besides Sungei Wang. The ladies there dress exotically with thick, gothic makeups. So, my sister and I were happily picking clothes off the shelves while my dear mummy was paying for it. Thank you mummy!!
On Friday, I hang out with Alina and Huei-wen. The initial plan was ice-skating in Sunway Pyramid but not many can turn up so there is a change in plan. it was very sweet and nice of Alina and Huei-wen to come down all the way to Sunway Pyramid so that I join them because Sunway is nearer to my house. Strolling in Sunway aroused a different feeling as we were unfamiliar with the place and shops. We had lunch at Kim Gary and took the opportunity to catch up with one another. Hw and I were exchanging thoughts on modern ladies strategies and approaches to initiate a decision and move. Haha, it was pretty entertaining. Later, we watched 2012. The TGV cinema in Sunway is way much more comfortable than One Utama one. It was full house. The movie was intriguing, triggering my emotions and making me to think what will I do if I was actually in their shoes. Will I repent for my thoughtless acts or finds ways to survive? I think all three of us did shed tears when humanity was put to test. In such predicament, human reveal their true nature. Some will have a magnanimous heart to save mankind while some are just more concern about their own well beings. One thing for sure, money can buy you a ticket to stay alive.
Have a safe and enjoyable trip to Shanghai Alina!!!!!
Then here comes the long awaited A-Levels Night on Saturday. My college A-Levels Night was held at PJ Hilton and the theme was Masquerade. Masquerade gives me a mystifying feeling and impression that a princess always meet her prince in a masquerade ball. Haha, i am too absorb with fairy tales ideas. It was a night to paint the town red for us as we just finished our AS exams.
Besides the scrumptious buffet, i was practically busy camwhorring and chit chatting. A few of my friends put the effort to get their hair and makeups done at salon. I was feeling lethargic to do so I looked simple and austere. Everyone was charming including the guys.
I won the second prize for luck draw.
Before the event was concluded, we had an open floor dance. Initially everyone was shy and strongly glued to their seats. As they blast the music and dimmed the lights, the night gone wild!! We whole group of girls were soon on the dance floor jiving our way with the rhythm of the music. It felt like clubbing to me!!! The audacious part was that the Head of A-Level Deparment was seated in the table right in front of the dance floor. The students were dancing while lecturers and invited guests were the audience. I think they craved to dance like us as well.
I did had a whale of time!! All too soon it comes to and end. Tomorrow, my classes for semester 3 will begin. I have class from 9am to 6.30pm on Monday. Long hours of absorbing and digesting imparted knowledge again So much about celebrating the freedom attained after exams. Its time to divert my attention back to my studies.
Adigos then
A series of unfortunate events unfold after I found out that I forgotten to bring my examination docket. Without the docket, I am not allowed to enter the examination hall. I only realised my careless act at around 8.40am when my economics paper was at 9.30am. My heart stopped beating and I stunted like for a few seconds before regained consciousness. I immediately call the adminstrator and informed her about my current predicament. Thank god I have the adminstrator mobile number. Its always good to get to know those office staffs. So, at around 9.15pm, I managed to get a copy of the docket and rushed my way to the exam hall.
I was panting when I reached the hall. I was so dissapointed when I flipped open the exam paper. The data response section was ok, but the essay part was not direct at all. My jaw droped after reading through the essay choices. It was like getting a smack in the face. My mood was sort of distorted then. Then, next was statistic paper. I just do not know what else more to said about it. Overall, the paper was ok but i was feeling kinda blue when i was sitting for the paper.
I was pretty sombre when I reached home. Lots of thoughts were popping in my minds and I do not why but I just had this bad feeling that things are not going to be alright. I am not sure of my future and where am I going to be in few years time. I felt that i was being let down many times and may be its time for me to surrender and just accept life as it is. The entire evening I was being pessimistic. Maybe i shoudnt even have 'big' dreams. I should 'mengukur baju di badan sendiri'. I should be contented with what I have.
Life is not a bed or roses and I am well aware of that. However its just so hard to put such outlook to practice.
I don know. Everything seems ambiguous to me now. Maybe its just a dilema I am facing with myself or something more than that.
I better put a stop to the hideous lie I put up with to explain my shameful act. All of that drama and conflicts within myself have to come to an end at this very moment.
I should spend my one week holidays with no regret!!!

A big group pics with the lecturers as well.
A-Level Club organized a visit to an orphanage home is Bangsar last Saturday. I was excited about this trip but felt inferior too because this is my first time visiting an orphanage home, interacting with them personally. Lots of thoughts were in my mind the night before the visit as I am trying to figure out how should I react with them to avoid them feeling being sympathize and vulnerable. I just did not want the children or teenagers there to feel unfortunate just because i am way much more fortunate than them. My mission there is to bring cheer and joy to their day.
And I did complete my mission with my head held high. The entire A-levels students and the children were having a whale of time. We introduced ourselves to them and then we all sang very meaningful song "Sing" by the carpenters. I got to carry young kids as young as 1 years old.
The children there are very different in a good way from the usual children I come across. When you stare into their eyes, it reflects their innocent but also their depth of understanding. There is no sound of tears throughout the entire morning. You wont get the annoying high pitch cries and hysteric screams They are so understanding for their age to compromise. They queeued up when we were distributing party packs, the young ones would politely ask for our help to open their party packs instead of them forcing it to open themselves spilling the foods all over the floor. Its just such a different scence there. Even though they were all smiles the entire day, they do have untold stories behind their closet. Once you listen to their overwhelming, thrilling, ups and downs life story, you will come to a realisation that we just pale in comparission mentally.
Here is a real life story:
This little girl is cute, adorable in every way but she has not open her mouth to say a word since her two years stay in the orphanage. Her name is Nancy and she had a harsh early childhood that led her to stay silence ever since. Nobody know why. All she seek is just attention and love from anyone. She love to be hugged and cuddled in arms and thats is the world to her. This is the power of 'HUG'. When she gets familiar with you, she will attach to you and cling on you for the entire day. Thats is her way of marking her teritory as she is proud to announce that you belong to her. You may not understand but since the children don get personal attention as we do in our homes, having someone to carry them, hug them and cuddle them is what they desire badly.
This trip is a wake-up call for me in everyway. I am so ashame of myself complaining not having this and that, and not looking like miss wannabee. Sometimes I tend to be oblivious towards my surrounding in this paper chase life. I just aim for achievements after achievements and lost the very basic sense of human touch which have kept us all intact and close. All those rants are so immature now after a day spent with the orphans. I should be feeling gratitude for being blissful in life.
Appreciate life as there will never be tomorrow.
The most happening event in my life for the past 1 month is that..................
I can drive finally!!
I cant wait to lay my hand on the steering wheel when I get my P license next week. I can go for outing more frquently then.
Next upcoming event is I am having my A-Levels trials next week. Therefrore, this week was hectic with lots of extra tutorial classes. I just had replacement classes today from 9am to 4pm. My stress level is basically rising now so wish me good luck.
Thats basically it. A brief and conscise description of happenings for last month. Nothing much happened besides the boring, mundane daily routine.
Good luck to others too who are about to sit for trials and Happy Holiday to those on term break!!!
Take care
As I watched the ballerinas swaying across the stage with their graceful dance steps, i cant help wondering why didnt I thought of learning ballet before this and be as graceful as them. That is my favourite performance for the night!!
Come to think about it, BUD 4 is awesome in many aspects. We have singer with melodious voice and some giving you goosebumps, cheerleaders emerging as champions with their poms-poms, dedicated teachers, supportive parents and brainiacs to keep BUD 4 traditions and history living.
Alina is so nice and kind, always allowing me to drop by at her house to shower before most of the outings as Bandar Utama is quite a distance from my house and it is a total waste of time to go back home after college. She and Qing Xian was seriously enjoying themsleves shouting at the tip of their voices for almost all the performance which kinda live up the atmosphere around us. One funny incident is that the row in front of us were shouting 'Guang Yao' but Qing Xian mistakenly thought it was 'One more' and she shouted it out loud. When she found out she was pulling in the wrong direction, she came up with a name Sally to cover up from embarassment. Then Alina said:" Oh Qing Xian you want us to call you Sally from now onwards?" It was even more hilarious if you were there on the spot because the cover up did not work that well after all. We did have a good laugh about it.
When the Form Five performed, I cant help to have a nostalgia for my secondary school days. Nostalgia paints a smile on the stony face of the past. A mixture of emotions started to pour in. Despite being in college with a hectic schedule, i do miss those days wearing school uniforms and waiting for the recess bell to ring. If had been so long since i go for a recess. College don really have recess, no paked food from home to share with friends. It is only now I come to realisation that I actually miss and rekindle my high school years but the irony is when i was in secondary school, I could not wait to be in college and enjoy the freedom dress code and time. How funny and silly of me??
Last but not least, thank you daddy for driving all the way down from Shah Alam just to pick me up and waited around 20 minutes for me just so that i could let my hair down being in the accompanion of my friends. I did have a whale of time.
Till then, good night
NO no i did not get a chance to do so. The movie was about to start when we entered as Alina kept us waiting for her. I was so wrong. I was not sleepy at all, my eyes were bright and fresh and i was all up watching the movie. Personally I love book 7 and book 6 as most of the mystery and secrets are being revealed. The actors emphasized tense moments by being histronic which results the audience being tense and anxious. Love was also blooming and sparkling among the main actors. Love is in the air!!! The movie was both good fighting evil and also letting emotions take it own course. The movie was approximately 3 hours long and it did not feel so long when i was watching the movie.
Alina was very cute when we were watching the movie. She grabbed my hand so tightly and when watching the horror sacry scene. Haha, thank god she did not grab Qing Lin who was sitted on the other side. I cant help wondering what if it did happen. Silly me.
I better not write in details and let the cat out of the bad as many people have not watch the movie. Go watch it if you can allocate time!!! Trust me......
In summary, thumbs up to J.K Rowling for her putting her ample imagination and creativity into words which put readers imaginations to work. I love Harry Potter series!!!
However, i was not feeling well after the movie and had a slight fever. Credits to the hazy weather and i was kinda feeling warm. I took my bath at about 10pm once i reachd home. My head felt kinda heavy and hit the hay as early as 11pm.
It was not a perfect day but at least i got to watch to movie i loved with my friends
The restaurant we ate Peking Duck
Second Day
In front of the shrine hall of the tomb
I think my dad and the Ming emperor look pretty alike.
They have a tummy and a round face.
The funny part was we have to cross this small gate near the exit and say "Wo Men Hui Lai Le". It is a superstitious belief but i just followed as I would not want to leave my soul behind in the 'another' world. The belief was when we enterthe emperor's kingdom in another world we visited his world and before we leave we are supposely to notify him that we are back to our world. That was exactly what i was told by the tour guide.
A family of 5. How lovely!!
China ppl always stare at us and shock that our family has 3 children. Haha, we gained attention everywhere in China
The Great Wall standing firmly after many years of coarsen under the rain and shine.
Aftera filling lunch, the next agenda is Great Wall of China. I laid my foot and trod on one of the seven wonders of the world. Yah, millions of people must have did the same thing to. The sun was glaring as my siblings and I climbed the flights of stairs. I put on my sunglasses and hat as my cheeks were getting red after exposed under the sun. My brother was the superman who was leading. He was overwhelmed to reach one of the watch house. My sister accompanied me and we climbed slowly but not as slow as a tortoise of course. My mum stayed at the hill base while my dad decided that it was enough and stopped when he was at the first watch house. The three of us achieved better that our parents as we stopped at the second watch house. The watch houses are a distant from each other.
They look cute doing the peace sign. Haha
Two stunning lads(perasan)
Late in the evening, the tour van dropped us at Hutong, an ancient street in Beijing. The scenery there was picturesque with alake in the middle and on both sides were old ancient buildings. We visited the entire place by sitting on a trishaws which was good to me as i do not need to walk that much. Dinner was Mongolian foods where the servings are unique in their own way but one thing for sure i was not used eating them.
Third Day
In front of Tianamen Square
The public transport in Beijing is very eficient. Thunbs up for the government. We have no problem in mobility as the the subway reacheds every part of Beijing. Forgotten to mention that 12 millions of people are living in Beijing. So you can imagine us squeezing in the subway with the locals during peak hours. Yah so we took a subway train to Forbidden City. The train ticket only costs RMB 2. How cheap is that?? I was ecstatic to visit Forbiden City because the royals used to live in it many centuries ago and it is located at the centre of the Earth. As a Chinese, of course I am proud with China long history, cultures and traditions. Being able to enter and witness the structure of the palace put me in a state of euphoria. This is my first time to China and I always watch Forbidden City from afar through documentray shows.
Awesome dad to bring us on this trip
A picture taken in the garden
At late in the evening, we took the subway once again and headed all the to the North of Beijing to visit the Birdnest and Water Cube which were made well-known after the Olympic in 2008. It was very windy and beside the stadiums is a 7star hotel The shape of the building looks like a dragon flying in midair. How cool is that? A 7star hotel. I will be one the room guest in the future. Definately.
One world, one dream, one family
Nice harmony colour of the Water Cube
My dad and mum with the 7star hotel behind them.
I will continue the other remaining 4 days in the next blog. There are lots of things to write for a one week holiday. Lazy to write in details so i guess my description of the trip is pretty conscisely.
Good night then
After watching a documentary about the life of women in India. I gave a deep thought about this topic. OH my god!! Girls in India are pitiful and live a miserable life to the extreme. As soon as a child is born families and society begin the process of gendering. The birth of the son is celebrated, the birth of a daughter filled with pain; sons are showered with love, respect, better food and proper health care. Boys are encouraged to be tough and outgoing; girls are encouraged to be homebound and shy. Having a daughter in the family is regarded as disgraceful and demeaning. Many infant baby girls are burned to death even before they are one month old. What idiotic parents will do so??
Tears started welling up my eyes when i heard this widow saying this: " I miss my children and I have not seen them for 20 years. Maybe they thought i was dead already. This is life." In India, If your husband died, then you will be totally isolated by the entire society because they regard widows as unlucky, jinx and bring bad luck to anyone who were to approach them. Therefore, all the widows in india will stay together in a centre after being chase out of their homes. They are not finacially independent and thus need to beg on the streets just to earn a living. Some were so desperate to survive that they sell themselves as prostitute just to live from hand to mouth. What hurts more is that there were girls as young as 20 years old being a widow and lost the freedom to lead a normal life. Young girls in India do marry to man as old 60 years old which can be their grandfathers. If they are unlucky and their old husbands passed away, then their fate is sealed. How preposterous and absurd is this?
I do not know whether to admire them or think that they are plain naive because they just accept life and fate as it is without trying fight back. A lady was interviewed to tell more her state of life. And guess what she said.... I am vulnerable and all i can do is to pray to god and accept my life. Thank god I am not born in India where customs and traditions are so strongly rooted in the society. Glad that i was given a fair chance to receive education, voice my opinion, get to day 'I do' to the person I love and not being explioted.
I just pray that those women suffering in silience will get their voices heard soon by the world because no one have the right to treat others at such a cruel and senseless way. In India, borned as a girl means that you will have no say in the society and men can just push you around. That is literally putting an end to a girl's life.
Equality.............How true is it in India??
Alina and I took the the undang-undang test together!! Glad to be accompany by her because it will definately be boring just being alone. Some people may feel best being left alone but i certainly don. No man is an isolated island but they are exceptions. I was at wits end when i was scored 42/50 for the trial test i did while waiting to enter the room. I am right at the border of failing, a slight mistake or misfortunes and I have to pay RM 50 to sit again and my mum wont be happy about this. However, things turned out for the better during the real test. I was checking all the 50 quetions from the beginning to the end for the last 20 minitues and only submit my answers at the last 4 minutes. Are you curious to know what was my scorce and Alina' scorce???
I got 47/50 and Alina got 45/50!!!
We both passed and were exchanging smiles. Sadly a guy who came with us failed, 40/50. Later, waited for my parents at Alina's house. Her mum's tomato rice was scrumptious. I even asked for the recipe to try it out myself at home. You should try it
yourself when you have the chance.
Friday was a rewarding for me. i scored highest in Maths test and I did modelling around the school for a magazine, PC. Com!!! Actually not the modelling like America Next Top Model. Just possed according to their insrtructions around the college Never heard of this magazines but the pictures will be in the next month june issue. Its a magazine which promotes to readers the latest gadgets in town. Yah, I did poss with the latest Accer (not sure of the brand) laptop. The whole photo taking took one a half hour. My check was stiff and ached after all the smilling. Maybe it is trivial matters to others but I am glad i was given a chance by the college to just model for a day for a section in a magazine.
When I told my mum about this, her reaction was "Why did you do free modelling for the magazine" "Dont you get anything??" Yah I dont get anything in return. Just a free copy of next month issue. Haha.......my mum's reaction was so unexpected.
Everything was according to plan this weekend. Hope I wont have monday blues tomorrow.
Good night
We always discuss homework together and she is my maths partner. Our name is similiar too.
I am Pei Ying (PY) and she is Ying Ying (YY/Y2). Our friends always call our names wrongly because of slip of tongue.
This upcoming event on thursday is sponsered by the Hotlink. Basically Hotlink has refurnished our student lounge with their latest gadgets and services. So this Thursday will be the official day for the lanch of this Mobile Youth Club. From the person-in-charge, I got to know that there will be press media on the day because my college is the pioneer to be having the Mobile Youth Club.
Can't wait for tomorrow because the other student leaders and I will be meeting up with the hotlink staffs for arrangements and discussion. I hope everything will turn out great on Thursday!!
My girls friend for that night is Huei-Wen, Alina, Hui Ling, Qing Xian and Audrey. We actually enjoyed the night life by having a swim at Qing Xian's apartment pool. I was early so I dropped by and waited at alina's house. I watched her so wide and clear flat screen tv and ate Tim Tan biscuits. Alina and her mum was so nice to me that I didnt feel awkward at all. Hui Ling later call and join us.
We had our swim at the Second floor swimming pool because we wanted privacy and was hoping we dont bump into anyone we know because we will be in our swimsuits except me. I didnt bring mine. Without fail we always take pictures of us possing as a model or just some random pose. Then we line up by the side of the pool getting ready to jump into the pool at the count of three. The funny part is after the count reached 3, no one jump except Huei-wen. Then later only we joined her in the pool. We wanted to swim to lose weight however our plan failed. I just swam a few laps then got tired and started chit-chatting with them. I think only Qing xian keep to the lose weight plan because she did swim a few lap more than all of us. Fast swimmer indeed.
After bathe, we went to Mamak Stall to pack out dinner. We planned to have our dinner by the pool side so that we can laugh out loud without ppl giving us a weird look. The leaves were rustling. My hair was all frizzy because of the srong breeze which was cooling in a way. I was loathed with foods after exercising in the pool. Later was the best part of the day. We open up our feelings and had a heart-to-heart talk. We shared about our problems in college and anything we find funny. Qing Xian and Hui Ling told a very hilarious story and we were all ears up. Haha, will always remember the tone and facial expression of Qing Xian when she said "his..........is very TIGHT".
I am glad I can make it for the swim. So thrilled to see Alina and she looked in the pink. This gives me an opportunity to keep myself updated with the life of my fiends. Yah, have a brief discussion with Audrey regarding SAT exam. So thats all for our simple version of All Girls Night Out.
*Sorry I don have any pics with me. Huei-wen please do send me those marvellous pics we took.
Thats all for now.
Memories flashed back today as I walked in the school hallway. As i was walking, I thought of someone without even realising. Those good and bad memories began to tell its stories. Stories which I kept and locked away somewhere in my memories. Hope i do not need to feel this way and ever confront that little moster who flies like a butterfly but sting like a bee. These little monsters taught me to always do a reality check because what i have in mind may be a far cry form reality.
Don't know why so emo. Maybe just want to put my thoughts into words. Summary of the day, I went to school for Hari Anugerah Cemerlang and met up with my group of friends. Hanging out with the is also a way to release stress. Will blog about the details later. I guess i have to hit the hay because there are lots of stuffs need to be done tomorrow. I hope everything can be completed by tomorrow and do not want to procrastinate because procrastination is the theft of time.
Good night then!!
The original plan included only four of us. Then we meet one the March intake students and invited her. She then invited the her other friends and that friends invited another friends. And that is how we end from 4 person to nine person. It is pretty hilarious because we waving to one antother to hurry up to catch the shuttle bus. We even played April Fool jokes on the one and only guy with us by saying that we changed out mind to head back to school for lunch.
On that afternoon, Alina sms me saying that she missed those days after she watched High School Musical 3. I was at class when I received her sms and memories of those days unfolede itself. How much i missed my bossom friends. Really hope ccan meet them up as soon as possible. My life would not have been so perfect if i hadn't met them
The very momment i stepped into the auditorium, i was stunned. The auditorium gives the impression of a Roman Catholic churh. There were just rows and rows of wooden chair, not those modern cushion soft chairs. Haha, i was laughing as i was walking towards my friends. The class was kinda of bored so we played a game on Gurpreet's laptop. Try guessing what game it is..............................
We played the GAME OF LIFE!! It was so fun playing with them. Some of us took on a challenging career like becoming a rockstar. Pavitra picked that for a try and we laughing our heads off. Eventually we got married and Ying Ying's husband was the best looking among our husbands. We tease throughtout the whole game. Babies came along too soon. I was the first to have babies and there are two of them because I had twins. At the end of the game, I ended up with 3 childrens same as Pavitra wheras Gurpreet and Ying Ying are still enjoying personal space with no intefrence of kids.
We stopped playing an hour later because the laptop battery was running low. It was raining heavily too that evening. All of us had trouble getting back home and boarding the shuttle bas. I sort of dislike rainy days. Firstly, the highways will be congested and the traffic is heavy. Rainy days also can affect my mood. I felt so gloomy when i was in the car. It is as though i delt the same way as Mother Nature who is shedding tears. When it is raining, there will be an urge to stay in bed and embrace in sleep or just merely do nothing because the weather makes me feel so contended. There is one thing i love about rainy days is that after a heavy downpour, everything looks fresh and new. It is as though Mother Nature showered the earth to give a frest start to everyone. I love to light cold breeze on my face and take deep inhale of the fresh air. It is like a new begining for me.
After so much of studying, reading, memorising and practising, tomorrow is the day where the result for all our hard work will be reveal. 'Reap what you sow' right???
Not forgetting,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
to
Qing Xian!!!
You are officially 18 now. Young lady already!!!!

